Thoughts of Mango

AKC! Actual Knitting Content!

2011-10-29T20:37:00.004-05:00

I have been knitting. Slowly but surely.

Currently I am working on a hat for a hat swap in Nerd Girl Yarns Bounce N Stomp in the color Luna Lovegood. Christa dyes lovely yarns and they are fantastic to work with. This particular yarn is a superwash sock yarn with a good bit of spring to it. The colors are a mix of cyan and lavender slightly bright but rather spacey like Luna herself. If you haven't checked out Nerd Girl Yarns I highly suggest that you do. She has wonderful bases and her colorways are a lot of fun.

I am also working on a bottom up raglan sweater. I want to have two sweaters done by New Year's. So far I am half way through the body of the first sweater. I'm not really using a pattern just sort of going with the flow of things. This may bite me in the ass later.

I've also finished a project! Whoo! I've been working on the Radiance Shawl for about 2 and a half months and I finished it earlier this month. It was a labor of love as towards the end I got really bored with it! Overall it was great knit, a lot of fun to do. The yarn I used was one of Shameless Twists yarns and it was fantastic to work with. I can't wait to do more projects with her yarn.

Searching

2011-10-07T20:34:00.003-05:00

Over the last several months I have been searching. I have looking for answers as to what to do with my life, what to major in, and what I spiritually believe in. Growing up I had a map of what my life would be like. Once I had graduated high school I would go to college, get married, become a teacher, stay at home with the kids, and be active in church. It was similar to what I had grown up with and I had thought that was a good life...Until I realized that I was living in a bubble, then I didn't know what to do. Since high school I have worked on rebuilding myself from the rubble that I was as a senior. Over the last four years I have gone from being a changed quite a bit. And I am proud of these changes. But despite the strides I have made in settling into my own skin, I still can't seem to figure out what I believe.

At various points over the last two years I have thought and declared myself an atheist and agnostic. Yet now neither one of those describe what I believe. In my heart of hearts I know that there is a G-d of some sort, I can not shake that feeling. Yet everything else gets a little odd. I know that when I sit in church I feel like calling bullshit. That Jesus, is probably not the Savior, but a Prophet like Mohammed, and the Bible is inspired by the word of G-d. Everything else, I just don't know and I just don't know where to begin to look. Thinking outside the box is never a good thing. I was brought up to be a good Presbyterian, not a free thinking...whatever I am.

There has been a class that I have been taking this semester, anthropology. This semester we are dividing into three groups and studying three different cultures in our area. I am in the group that is studying the Muslims. From what I have learned so far I want to learn more about other religions. This has only whet my appetite and I am craving more. Maybe I will find what I am looking for?

New Year's

2011-08-22T14:31:00.002-05:00

Going back to school has always seemed more like a "new year" than the actual holiday. I know that it is mostly due to being in school for the last eighteen years. But every year around this time I feel that a new season is truly upon us. Fresh school supplies, a change from the warm weather to cool, shorts to sweaters; all mean something new is coming.
This year there is a lot of new for me. A new major, new roommates, and a new building to live in. Its like I am a freshman all over again! And of course the New Year's Resolutions keep seem to crop up. I know that my ultimate goal is to achieve a semester average of a 3.0 and to focus make school my number one focus and everything else second. This essentially means, putting myself first in order to take care of things. An interesting way of thinking of things.

Tour De Fleece-What Did We Learn?

2011-07-23T08:59:00.002-05:00

The Tour de Fleece ended yesterday. I am sure many people ended with much accomplished. I am sorry to say that I am not one of those people. During this time of competition and reflection, I learned that I suck at deadlines. Having a deadline means that I will avoid spinning at every possible chance. I had goal of spinning well over 8 ounces of fiber. I thought this was very doable. I barely spun two ounces. Yeah...talk about fail.

So what did we learn kids? Don't give Mango a deadline with spinning, she won't follow through.

Tour De Fleece-Week One Review

2011-07-09T10:49:00.000-05:00

Week one has been a bust. I have spun one and a pinch more ounces this week. I've been distracted and unfocused. With family coming into town I just wasn't on my game. My spindle has two arch enemies right now. My shoulder and my Iced cardigan. My shoulder has been acting up since spinning all day at Maker Faire at the end of June. It just hasn't been the same and its really tight. Its hard to spin for more than ten minutes at a time. The Iced cardigan is a cardigan that I have been working on since mid June. I am almost done with the sleeves. Once the sleeves are done all I will have to do is weave in the ends and block it.

So for week two I will try to pick back up and spin half an ounce a day (that's not too crazy is it?) to get myself back on track. If I spin more that is great if I don't that's fine too. The point is to have fun with it.

Tour De Fleece-It Is On!

2011-07-02T20:52:00.003-05:00

The Tour de Fleece is on! So far I have spun an ounce on my drop spindle and I am happy with that. I have a NEW goal of spinning 8 ounces for CPAAG but I would like to spin more than that. So I have 2.4 oz of angora blend, 4 oz of super-wash merino, 2 oz of blf/silk blend. If I get that done then there is 2 oz of wool silk blend, and 2 oz of Romney alpaca blend. I had originally posted on doing something different, but I realized why I stopped working on those projects in the first place...I hated the fiber! There is no sense in working on a project that you hate. So I chose to a new challenge. I still plan on kick spindling at least 20 minutes three times a week.

Below are pictures of the fiber that I will be working on the next couple of weeks

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Tour De Fleece

2011-06-19T13:13:00.004-05:00

The Tour de France is coming up. I have never watched it before as I have no interest in biking or anything related to it. I do have an interest in fiber.

The Tour de Fleece occurs during the Tour De France. Spinners of all types and skill levels are encouraged to test there skills and push forward in their craft by setting goals for them selves The basic guidelines are to spin every day of the Tour rides (July 2nd through the 24th) and take two days of rest on the 11th and 18th. On the 22nd you are encouraged to spin something challenging as the riders face the tour's toughest mountain.

Ravelry has various groups setting up with challenges, themes, support, and prizes! This year I am taking part for the first time and spinning in team Bacon Cake Waffle (Completely Pointless and Arbitrary Group's team) and the Kick Spindler's team. I have set several goals for the Tour.

1. Kick Spindle 20minutes 3 times each week.
2. Finish all three spindle projects (including washing and plying)
3. Spin at least another 4 oz of stash fiber after reaching goal
4. Spin every day for at least 20 minutes.
5. Avoid pissing of the Fiber Gods

Lofty, but doable. It will be interesting to see how I do. Wish me luck!

My First Fiber Festival

2011-06-14T12:43:00.004-05:00

This past weekend I went to my first fiber festival. The Iowa Wool and Sheep Festival to be precise. Three friends and my self traveled about three and a half hours to attend the festival. This festival was a first my friends and I. None of use were sure what to expect.

We arrived in Iowa the night before, so we were ready to go on Saturday morning. When we arrived two of us immediately went to classes while the other to wandered the grounds. I was lucky to attend the Wet Felting class, held by a kind and informative teacher. Having never wet felted before I was excited to learn a new craft. During the class we made mittens and learned how to create fabric out of fiber. There are many ways to make fabric including: weaving, knitting, crocheting, sprang, braiding, nalbinding, knotting or netting, or interlocking fibers. Using wool fiber we agitated it with warm water over a mitten stencil. Once we had a formed shape we continued to agitate and shrink the fiber to make it fitted to a human hand as the form was the perfect size for a giant. After we created our mitten and fitted it we then put it in a vinegar rinse to help keep it from shrinking and to make it color fast. We had a great time learning about the process and discussing what you can do with wet felting. I am really looking forward to doing more wet felting in the future!

Once classes were over we all met up again ate lamb burgers and wandered the grounds drooling over fiber. There were at least dozen and a half vendors selling fiber, yarn, weaving/knitting/crochet supplies, and sheep paraphernalia. It was so neat seeings so many crafters and fiber folk. If it wasn't for the fact that I was set on not buying anything until Sunday and just looking around, I would have easily spend all my money and then some right then and there. Sunday was the last day of the festival and buying day and let me tell you I was glad that I waited.

I came home with 3 skeins of yarn, a basket, three sets of knitting needles, a shawl pin, 4oz of green merino, 8oz of mutli colored merino, 2.4 oz of angora coopworth blend, 3 oz of alpaca, 2 oz of cotton, 2 oz of alpaca Romney blend, 2oz of mohair soysilk blend, 1.3 oz of BLF blend, and finally 2 oz of merino silk blend. Over 24 ounces of fiber all together. I may or may not have gotten a little bit...excited when buying, but for what it is worth there is only one place in the area with fiber or spinning supplies in a 2 hour radius. While it probably seems a excessive, when I look at it the new fiber stash is only going to help me learn more about fiber and help me hone my skills on the drop spindle.

The Iowa Sheep and Wool Festival was more fun that I thought it would be. My friends and I shared a lot of laughs and learned a lot about each other and fiber. It was a fantastic experience that I hope to have again someday. The more I learn about knitting, spinning, and fiber the more it becomes apart of who I am.

Purl SoHo and Lion Brand Yarn Studio

2011-05-27T18:17:00.006-05:00

While I was visiting my family, I got the opportunity to visit New York several times. During that time I made it my goal to visit two places; Purl SoHo and Lion Brand Yarn Studio. I was fortunate enough that I was able to go to both during my time. I only wish I could have gotten to go to more yarn shops while I was there!

Purl SoHo is a beautiful shop. When you walk in you are greeted by walls of color. The left and right walls are covered in yarn. The back walls are filled with fabric. In the center of the shop there are several "islands" of book shelves with sale yarn, fabric, and books. The shop has a clean and simple look, which makes the shop so charming. Many of the yarns carried by the shop are higher end, if you are a bargain shopper it may be better to hangout by the sale yarn or one skein to treasure. The staff at Purl were super kind and very helpful when I was there. I wish I could have stayed longer! I took home a skein of gorgeous skein of blue organic laceweight wool and four ounces of hot pink tencel/wool fiber for spinning. I look forward to using them in the up coming months.

Lion Brand Yarn Studio is a super fun shop. The staff is friendly and helpful (and willing to listen to your life story...not that I told them or anything)and the shop is funky and fun. At the entrance of the shop there is a wall with all of the on goings and offerings of the shop and the company. This is great for returning customers and visitors. To the right there is a wall with there standard lines of yarn. Most of which you find in Micheal's, JoAnn's, etc. In the center of the room there are tables for classes and help and also their Collection Yarn; this is where I spent most of my time. While most of Lion Brand's yarns you can find in stores, their collection yarn is only available online and in the shop. Their Collection yarn is fantastic to touch! Like the rest of their lines it is reasonably priced and it is worth every penny. The Angora Merino blend and Baby Alpaca made their way into my shopping bag.

I had a fantastic time in New York and in New Jersey visiting my family. Visiting the yarns shops was simply icing on the cake. Both shops have loads of personality and appeal to different types of knitters. I look forward to the next time I got back to the Big Apple, whenever that is only the next time I will take the opportunity to visit more shops.

Actual Knitting Content!....Coming Soon!

2011-05-23T20:41:00.002-05:00

Big surprise right?

I am currently out of state visiting family. During my trip I have gotten to visit Purl SoHo and the Lion Brand Studio! And let me tell you I have some awesome things to share!

One of These Days I Will Write About Knitting

2011-04-26T20:13:00.006-05:00

But that is not today.

I have spent four years in school. I have learned somethings, not a lot, but a few things. Right now many several friends have also spent four years in school, working hard and accomplishing goals. This May they are graduating. I am so proud of A, B, C and E. They have worked so hard. I wish I could be graduating with them this year, but that is not to be. I wish I could be graduating next year, but I don't think that is in the plans either.

This semester I discovered that no matter how much I study, no matter how much I work I put an assignment, no matter what I do; its just not enough. Its not enough to pass and its not enough to further myself in my previously chosen path. I could choose to appeal my grades and fight to stay in the program. Yet even if I did win my appeal, I would still need to retake the courses and deal with two professors that do not care for me.

It is time for me to move on.

Over the last few weeks, I have been stressed and overwhelmed to the point of physical illness because of these classes. I love my major and but it is no longer worth my mental and physical well being. It is really hard for me to end this part of my life. I am not sure about this new degree that I will be pursuing. It is something I know little about, yet have loads of curiosity towards. It will be interesting. I am hoping that with this change, I will be able to still finish school...without going completely broke.

She was the best

2011-04-03T22:29:00.005-05:00

My Grandmother passed away a week ago today. She had gone to lunch in the nursing home and was getting ready to eat when she died of a heart attack (so we believe) she was going to come home from the nursing home/rehabilitation center on Wed.

I can't believe she's gone.

She was a wonderful grandmother and mother. She loved us all dearly. Her body has been wearing down for a long time, but she had been doing so good the last five weeks you would have thought they had taken five years off of her! She had a talent and passion for music. She played the piano, organ, and baritone for many many years. Grandma was always a lady, although she'd tell you if something was tacky. She was the best. The earliest memory I have of her would be us baking cookies in the kitchen, with me licking the beaters. I don't think either of us knew it, but those early baking days were just a small taste of what the cooking addiction I currently have would be.

This last week has been terrible. I have never seen the people I love in so much pain. My Grandpa is beside himself with grief, he has lost his best friend and soulmate. Grandma was his memory, she kept detailed notes of just about everything and you could write a history book based on her journals. Grandma loved Grandpa dearly. Whenever she needed help getting up from the table or any where, Grandpa would be there and Grandma would look up at him with her beautiful blue eyes twinkling at him. They were each other's world. I have never seen him in so much pain and hurt, and that is saying something because eight days before Grandma passed away we lost my Great Uncle (Grandpa's brother in-law) and the two of them were the best of friends. He was the brother Grandpa didn't have, as he had sisters.

This poem was found somewhere in the farm house and we put it in with some of the funeral things. It chokes me (and just about everyone else in the family up) because it is very true in the case of Grandma. She has been through so much, healthwise, and she has been so worn.

When tomorrow starts without me
And I'm not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldnt cry
The way you did today,
While thinking of the many things
We didn't get to say
When Tomorrow starts without me
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready
In Heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
All those I dearly love
God knew that I could never be
The way that I had been,
And he knew that I would never,
Get well on earth again,
He saw the road was getting rough,
And the hills were hard to climb;
So he closed my weary eyelids,
And whispered "Peace Be Thine"
And though I had to leave you,
I didnt go alone;
A part of you went with me,
The day God called me home

Author Unknown,

A story from a friend: The Rocks

2011-03-13T17:17:00.005-05:00

Last night was a bit of a rough night for me. For a variety of reasons things simply crashed and I needed someone to talk to so I went to a friends house. We talked for a long time about the reasons why I was upset and others. Towards the end of our time together she told me a story about a village and the rocks that the villagers carried. This story has been on my mind all day, mostly because it puts things into perspective.

The story goes like this:

One day a tribe of beings were given a gift. A gift of rocks. Little rocks. Big rocks. Precious rocks. Worthless rocks. Some so beautiful you would have wondered how the givers could part with it. Some so horrible you would wonder why someone would give it to another. So, so many rocks. The tribe was also given a yoke and a couple of buckets to carry their newly acquired rocks.

The givers told the tribe that they knew of a place for the tribe to live. It was quite a trek from here to there. Up a hill. across a wide river. It was a beautiful place. Lush and happy. The tribe decided it was worth the walk. So off they went.

Shortly they came to the hill the givers had told them about. It wasn't a very big hill. It certainly wasn't a very steep hill. The tribe started up the hill. Some of the tribe trotted right up the hill. Some of the tribe quit part way up. Some of the tribe struggled with their rocks.

Eventually one of the tribe set down his yoke. He looked in his buckets. He decided he could drop one of the rocks. Which he did and pick up his yoke but his burden was uneven now. Once more he set down his rocks and picked another rock to drop. This time his yoke was balanced! It was still heavy but manageable. His pace quicken up the hill. Those of the tribe behind him saw what he had done. Some thought,"Why did he drop those rocks? Those were his rocks. I will never drop my rocks! They are my rock and important to me." Still other saw the wisdom of the first's actions and did the same.

In due time, most of the tribe had made it up the hill leaving behind those who decided it was just too hard. The those left behind stayed at the bottom of the hill. Those who had made it up the hill, the ones who had struggled and those who had not, moved on.

They walked and walked. Ever so often some would set down their burdens and drop some rocks. All of a sudden they where at the shore of the river. The river was very wide and not very deep, only about knee high on the average tribe member.

Those of the tribe who had charged up the hill plunged right in to the slow moving water. Crossing the river was a lot harder than climbing the hill. Some of these beings had to stop and lighten their load. When it was time for the being, who had 1st drop his rocks, to enter the water he paused. He considered what the givers had said when they had given the tribe their rocks. They said, "Here these are yours. Here is a yoke to carry them with." They had never told the tribe to take the rocks. They had never said the tribe needed to keep the rocks. They had just said these are yours.

He ponder this for a moment. He knew he wouldn't make it across the river with all of those rocks. So he decided. He went through his rocks. He held them up to the light. He looked at each and every one of them. Some he kept. A lot he dropped. When he reached the bottom of his buckets. He only had a handful or so of rocks to keep. This time he didn't pick up the yoke. He just walked right in and crossed the river passed all the others.

When he got to the other side, it was just a beautiful as the givers said it would be. He was happy. He still had a few of his rocks with him. Little rocks. Big rocks. Precious rocks. Worthless rocks. Some so beautiful you knew why he kept them. Some so horrible you would wonder how he could look at them. But all of the rocks could be carried and all of them were his.

Why I don't Post

2011-02-28T21:20:00.004-06:00

1.I am LSG and I've got the L really bad

2. I don't know what to write

3.Instead of blogging I am on Ravelry(an awesome knitting and crocheting site). And if that is how you came here (through ravelry) then you probably know what LSG is. For those who don't what the L stands for Lazy and I am not going to tell you what the rest is. Sorry :(

4.School is just so over whelming and looking at the computer will make me cry( definetly contricts the reasons above)

5. I don't know what to write

6. I am busy knitting

7. I don't know what to write

8. My life is dull and therefore I can not write, because I have nothing interesting to write about.

9. I had wrist surgery around New Year's and couldn't type for a while without lots of pain. The terrible drawing below is my wrist and hand.

So there it is.
My reasoning for not updating. If you think there is something that should write about or at least attempt to write about please let me know. I would love to try and work on becoming a better and more interesting writer. I will make some more half hearted attempts at updating and posting on this thing...but I give you no certainty

Turkeyday Thoughts...sort of

2010-11-25T20:56:00.002-06:00

Thought 1 I loathe the holidays. Even though I am young, I have despised them for years. The commericalism is once aspect of it I suppose. Hearing Christmas Carols before Halloween is rather irritating and the sight of the those perfect little houses decorated to the T without a flaw gets to me, and of course we can't forget the toys for big and little girls and boys. But that is not what gets to me, its the falseness of it all that really irks me. Families that don't get along or communicate are supposed to get together and be all happy and act like everything is wonderful when in reality the world is crumbling and there is no Santa to make it better and no Superman to save them from the wreckage.

Thought 2 I think my sister and I are growing up. After 17 years of fighting, tattleing, and giving the silent treatment; we are starting to get along and treat each other like people, like family. She has gone to Hawaii for a choir tour with her school this Thanksgiving. Today wasn't the same without her. Dinner lasted a grand total of fifteen minutes and started before my mom and I even sat down. No one spoke at the table. I know that if she were at least here we would be throughly disecting the 7th Harry Potter movie and making plans to get the hell out of the house but still avoid Black Friday.

***I promise knitting content! I swear!***

Thought 3 Depression is an ugly bitch that should die in an effing fire.

Thought 4 The thought of losing another grandmother literally makes me ill. Gma D has had such horrible health for nearly 30 years. I know that we all want and need her here, but the life she currently has is not living. Being bedridden with a broken back, an anursym(misspelled), arthritis, and knees and hips that need to be replaced is just not a way to live. But I am scared of what will happen when she leaves this earth. The family, particularly my mother, is just not going to be the same

Thought 5 Knit on through all crisis. If you knit two stitches and purl two stitches on an even number of stitches for many rows you will have ribbed fabric. If you knit one purl one on an odd number of stitches you will have seed stitched fabric. A pullover is basically three tubes; two for the arms and one for the body. You can break down a sweater even further by making a back, one front and two arms(still a pullover) or for a cardigan one back, left front, right front, and two arms. Hats can be knit two ways, from the top down or from the bottom up. When all else is chaos you can always take two needles (or chopsticks, pencils...) and some from of yarn or string, loop them in a specific order and make fabric. Unless you royally arse it up, you will have fabric made of loops that is connected and dependent on each other.

Intimacy

2010-08-10T19:03:00.002-05:00

I knit in Walmart. I knit at home. I knit in Borders, a Starbucks Cafe inside a Target, and at a bowling alley with friends. I knit when I'm at work. I've once knit in a restroom(in the louge/powder room part of it mind you). I will knit anywhere and every where that I possibly can.
Working with my hands calms and soothes my ever racing mind. Its a chance for me to stop, slow down, and be present. A meditation if you will. But for the most part it is the public act of knitting that people see. Few people really see the conversations or understand the conversations that I have with the people I knit with. Only a fellow crafter ever sees the heart and emotions that I put into my knitting. And only I know what goes on as I knit. The thoughts that are thought, the hurt that is healed, the chaos that is calmed. My knitting is probably one of the most intimate aspects of my life. I may do it in public and talk about it non-stop, but what goes into my knitting is the stuff that diaries are written of. When I look at a piece of my knitting I see the laughter that was shared at knit night, the tears that were brought on by another frustrating day with family, and the confusion that growing up brings. These little detials stitched in one by one, interlocked and intertwined. The little bits of me.

"You Knit To...

2010-06-21T19:36:00.003-05:00

save your life" pg 35 of A fiction book about knitting/knitters of which the title escapes me.

Depression sucks, and I've been living with it for six years. It takes alot to get to the point where you can admit that you are sick. To accept the fact that you are sick with something no one can really see, but that you can feel is overwhelming. You dont want to be labled as "crazy" or "unfit" or become "one of those crazies". I have finally accepeted that my depression is going to be something that I live with. I realized at the end of my freshmen year of college that I couldnt live like the way I was. The things going on in my life at that time made me feel, and still often make me feel; powerless, simple minded, fake. This was not a life I wanted to live. After finding the right doc and the right meds my life was (and currently) is closer to what I want it to become, but I still have a long way to go. A journey I suppose.

Although after all of that there was something that was missing. While I was now capable of being able to deal with most of the world, there was something that needed to change. I needed the knowledge and humor of people who were similar to me. Mostly in regards to the one thing that kept me going during some of the darkest nights and to the one thing that drove everyone I knew up the walls because it was one of few things that could help me out of a funk or at least get me to talk.

I needed knitters.

I needed people who understood why I was inimintated by lace. I needed people who loved sock yarn. I needed people who we mildly patient. I needed people. Thus began my search for a knitting group and in December of 2008 I had found my people. Through Ravelry, I stumbled upon the coolest and most talented group of ladies that I have ever met. *I have since then met many more awesome amazing knitters, spinners, dyers, and crocheters. And I am still blown away at the awesome power of crafters*

These gals are full of life, passion, and yarn. Getting to know them and knit with them over the last year and a half has been incredible. So much has changed in me since getting together with this group (and the new one that I go to!) Knitting gave me a life, but these knitters have given me the confidence and inspiration to really live it.

KitH

2010-04-22T20:42:00.009-05:00

Recently the Sunflower Knitting Guild hosted Knitting in the Heartland 2010. KitH is a confrence with classes, vender market, and amazing people. SKG puts on the the confrence every other year, in the off years they host a knitting retreat for members(note to self must become a member).
Until this year I had never heard of the confrence, but thanks to friends and Ravelry, I realized there was no way for me not to go. And let me tell you, I am so glad that I did!

My friend K and I met up at the confrence and feasted our eyes on absolute amazingness! And entire confrence room filled with crafters of all sorts and beautiful wares ranging from fiber and yarn to buttons and magnets, to mini alpacas and stuffed creatures. The organizers of the confrence did a wonderful job, and made all feel welcomed. The vendors were full of knowledge and were more than happy to answer questions or simply talk. And of course I got to run into some of my wonderful friends from my knitting group back home!

Now because the fiber fumes were so strong...I came home with quite a few goodies.

5 batts and rovings from the Art Club Shop, one batt from the WoolieBullie, and a beautiful skein of bamboo/merino fingering weight from Th'red Head

Chaos and Knitting

2010-04-19T23:40:00.003-05:00

There has been a lot of knitting going on here in my neck of the woods. Since my last post I have made:

one Storm Cloud Shawlette Shawl(to be pictured)

one Francis Revisited (tbp)

one alpaca scarf

one monster chunk(already pictured)

finished the sweater of doom (may visit ravlery for pictures)

begun working on Glee (Zephyr Style)

and the Button Up Pullover by Laura Chau.

Wheew! That is a lot of knitting!

I have also been working towards changing my major (not a big change but its still a change), trying to keep up with my family, and random dating adventures. Needless to say I am looking forward to the end of the semester, but also the beginnig of summer and R&R. This last year has been crazy, and not in the good way I'm afraid. Hopefully this summer will bring some peace and decision making that will make the next year even better.

Until next time!

Oops...

2010-04-14T21:14:00.002-05:00

Its been a while since I've posted. I promise I havent dropped off the face of the earth! Lol And I do have some knitting content to post soon. So for now I will leave you with a hint of what is to come.

Gone

2010-02-09T20:45:00.002-06:00

Mary Ethel is gone.
My chest hurts.
She will be missed.

Mary Ethel

2010-01-26T13:03:00.002-06:00

Her name is Mary Ethel. For as long as I can remember she has been only "crafty" person in my family for many years. She has traveled to China and Alaska. She has created beautiful paintings and lovely hand made cards for each my brother, sister, and I. She is the most functional person on my dad's side, never hiding her heart or what she knew. She has accpeted things for what they are. She has lived her life and she is prepared to leave this world. At 88 years old and a heart valve leaking her time now is short. Very short. She is preparing to go into hospice, so that the rest of her time here may be as peaceful and painless as can be. Despite the fact that she is in California and my family is in the Midwest and we haven't seen her in nearly six years, she has always been a phone call away. Its not going to be that way any more and it hurts. It is like someone sucked out all the air out of my chest. Despite the fact that she is not gone yet, I feel like I have already lost her. She is not the same spunky great grandmother I once knew. You can hear it in her voice. She is tired. I only hope that she is comfortable and that she knows how much I love her.
I love you grandma I always will

Of All The Things

2010-01-08T21:36:00.002-06:00

Of all the things to write about at the first of the year I write the pissy note...good grief!
I suppose to remedy this I should write something happy...

Here is a link to Lamebook.com it is the best and worst facebook has to offer and it makse me smile

http://www.lamebook.com/

Really Now?

2010-01-08T17:00:00.003-06:00

Why is it that the people we love the most make us the craziest? I'm pretty sure I already know the answer but sometimes its nice to ask it out loud.
I love my family, I truly do. I have the most amazing mother in the world. She does incredible things for our family that she should have to do, but because of certain people and situations she has to. My mother is the strongest person I know and I love her so much. The rest of the family has many talents and strengths but I swear I am going to smack them all and semd them away. My brother goes back to school this weekend and my sister should have hs assuming they don't have anymore snow days so they will be out of the picture soon, but my Dad. Oh my Dad...He is a child. He is a pain in the ass who does not respect my mother or has any manners toward anyone else. He self centered and frankly a dumbass. There are alot of things he is not, but damn it he is a father and a husband and he sure as hell doesn't act like it! I am sick and tired of watching my mother bust her ass over and over again. Making sure the bills are getting paid and there is food on the table while he is sitting on his 6month unemployed ass watching the damn t.v.
I am sick of it.
There is so much more to it all. He yells at her in front of her parents, he refuses to eat the for that mom or I cook, he goes to the movies multiple times in a week and takes no one with him! He bitches and moans when asked about getting a job or the unemployment check saying its his money and that he'll do what he wants.

I am so tired of it.

Going back to school in a week, going on a day trip with my knitting group. I can't wait to get away.

So much to do so little time!

2009-12-22T15:34:00.005-06:00

So many projects to get done!

Aunt D's sweater (not even a 1/4 of the way through)-Was going to have it done by Giftmas but thats not going to happen. The new goal date for this sweater is V-Day. I really hope I can get it done. Its the most teidous knitting I've done in awhile, I am using the Indigo Playmate Sweater from Custom Knits beautiful sweater, just dislike not knitting in the round

Francis Revisited Sweater- Made from Cascade Eco+ Wool in Black. I've been wanting to make this sweater for a while now and I finally have the "perfect" yarn for it. Can't wait to work on it some more

Cherry Red Shawlette-Using Cherry Tree Hills Supersock Solids in Cherry(now theres a tounge twister!) Just increasing at the beginning of each row and knitting through it on size 8. Its good comfort knitting, plus the yarn is simply divine!

With all this knitting and holiday non-sense it will be wonderful when the Giftmas and New Years are through. As nice as the break from school is, it gets a bit old with the chaos in the stores and the pressure to buy the "perfect" gift for family members along with being apart of the "happy" family when ya'll would really like to stay the h**l away from one another.

To finish off. I did end of finishing the green shawl with the Textiles A Mano yarn. Its a the perfect shawl for bumming about the house in my pjs. I wish TAM was still in St. Joe, this yarn would be perfect for sweaters or slipper socks.

Finals

2009-12-10T18:35:00.010-06:00

Being told that "these are the best years of your life" really sucks. Whats so great about constantly being broke, having professors and employers constantly down your throat about what you screwed up, trying to decide if you should go into debt for "a good education" or to tough it out a few years working at a job you will probably hate and not last very long at

Its finals week and to say that I am wigging out would be an understatement. I am pretty sure that I have gone and lost my marbles. Proof-I warmed my car up and worked on taking off the 8inch deep pile of snow on top of my car with my bare hands Proof-After I studied for tomorrows final I went and told everyone in the lobby of my Res. Hall why this particular professor is a massive douche...then I slid in some snowy water...Not a good day.

I keep wondering if I'm doing the right thing, if I'm getting the right degree for me and if I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. I know I am supposed to work with kids, its what I've always done and its what I love doing; but teaching? Is teaching the right path for me? Is this going to get me where I need to go? Is it going to be worth going into all the debt and loans? This is what keeps getting to me and I don't know what to do about it.

My after all of that I suppose I should mention knitting, eh?

Right now I am working on a quick squishy shawl out of some yarn from Textiles A Mano, called Mamina. Its wonderful to work with, Merino wool has always been a favorite of mine and Laura's yarn is no exception. This bulky weight yarn has been fab to work with and I can't wait to finish it and block it so that I can wear it about.

Sticks and String

2009-12-07T19:59:00.004-06:00

Even though I've been knitting for five years it always amazes me the effects it has on me. Knitting has gotten through a deep two year long depression, my fathers various mood swings (Yay for BiPolar Disorder) over the years, leaving for college, and a couple of heart aches. Yet kniitng never judges me, tells me to suck it up, or says anything really. It just waits for me to come to it, day after day, project after project. There are few people like that in this world these days...

Today I day tripped with some friends to the land of BBQ and Jazz for a day of fun before our finals this week. My first step into the yarn shop was like coming home to your favorite dessert; scents of memories, laughter, and hope. This was the first time I had ever set foot into this shop and I was greeted by a delightful black cat named Addi (after the knitting needles Addi Turbo) and a kind woman probably in her mid to late fifties who was so much fun to talk to. Its so funny how one can be when they get together with "one of their own". Jokes of being one of few knitters on campus and a converstation about this particular shop being the closest one to my school made me miss the sense of community one gets with knitting. The people I have been since I have began knitting have done nothing but amaze me with their passions, talent, and kindness. Never would I thought I'd have some one just hand me their project and ask me what they think or to give me a gift of yarn when they hardly know me.

Everytime I think about where I have started on my knitting journey I am awed and amazed. I cant wait to see whats next on this road of yarn.

The Beginning

2009-12-06T22:37:00.001-06:00

So how about them KC Royals, eh?
Oh its not baseball season...
Anyways...

I have decided to enter the world of the blog-o-sphere just to see where the journey takes me. I used to write a little bit in high school, just to get thoughts out and try to make sense of the world, particularly my reality. Writing has never been my strength, but there is something to be said for putting thoughts on paper, or on the internet ;)

It cracks me up that in high school so many of my friends and I would write these terribly dramatic stories and depressing poems about our lives and emotions and then we would go and have who ever was willing to read it and critique it. I find it rather interesting as I begin writing this blog. I am putting my little heart out for the who ever to find and critique, maybe meet some people, maybe improve upon myself.

For now I will leave this entry with a few bits of me.
-I am a knitter, I have been knitting for half a decade
-I battle depression, gastroparisis, GERD, and IBS and have been doing so now for 4 years
-Currently am an education major with an early child hood emphasis
-I love mangos and grapefruit
-Because I have no idea what I am going to write about I figured I would come up with a random blog name and title. If I can change it later, I may